OFFICIAL WILDERNESS EXPLORER DISTRESS MESSAGE

[wilderness_explorer]

GOOD AFTERNOON. MY NAME IS RUSSELL. I AM A SENIOR WILDERNESS EXPLORER IN TRIBE 54, SWEAT LODGE 12. I AM LOST AND DO NOT KNOW MY WAY HOME. I HAVE MADE A FIRE AND AM USING THIS THINGY TO TRY ANd fi woah so THAT's how you make the lEtTeRs LiTtLe I wOn

[Post Terminated - Typing Errors consistent with Spambots]

Comments

[wilderness_explorer]

Oh so that's why mom won't let me have one of thse things at home

[chacha]

OMIGOSH HI! MY NAME IS CHACHA! What's yours?!

[wilderness_explorer]

I'm Russell! Are you lost out here too or are you somewhere with a bus stop? I think I still have my Citi Pass somewhere...

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[chacha]

No busses heer Ruffle! But we hav cabins! Oh! And Island-san plays games with us!! Its so fun!

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[wilderness_explorer]

Oh! Maybe this is some kind of SPECIAL CAMP... Are you Senior Wilderness Explorer from the girl's division? I heard that sometimes they did boy and girl camps together but my tribe hasn't done any.

Is Island-san the cownsler cos I don't see any cabins and they didn't put a tent in my bag.

You've got to be kidding me...

[medieval_diabetic]

This island abducted another child?

Are you okay Russell? Do you need help?

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[wilderness_explorer]

I was ABUCTED? I heard that word on the news before but I don't know if I know what it means, my vocablury badge didn't need me to learn it.

I'm totally OK because I am a Wilderness Explorer and a Friend To All Of Nature. But I would like to get home because Mr. Fredericksen was taking me for ice cream tomorrow and I don't think he is here. I haven't seen any ice cream stores either.

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[medieval_diabetic]

Kidnapped, basically.

I hate to break it to you kid, but I think you're stuck here for a lot longer than you think. Let's hope those friendly nature skills are useful here. Everything bites.

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[wilderness_explorer]

How did I get kidnapped? I thought that only happened when you talked to strangers and took chocolate from them, but I know never to take chocolate from strangers even if it is really good chocolate...

Are you sure everything bites? Maybe I should set some Official Wilderness Explorer traps.

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[wilderness_explorer]

Oh! Are YOU in need of assistance? A Wilderness Explorer helps those in need.

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[medieval_diabetic]

Um, no...no I'm good. But perhaps I should come find you just in case something worse finds you first.

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[chacha]

Dont talk to this strayng man Bustle! He swars a lot! Hes Mister Potty Mowth!

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[wilderness_explorer]

When we say bad words at tribe meetings we have to go and sit in the corner. But he's an adult and my mom says sometimes grown ups say bad words because they got lice senses or something.

Do you think maybe they all have lice in their hair and it gives them super powers? No one will tell me I think it's a secret.

Re: You've got to be kidding me...

[wilderness_explorer]

Well I have a map but I can't make the compass arrow point the same way as the arrow on the map and I think I went around in a circle. Do you think the map is broken?

[voodoo_revenge]

I don't think you're going home very soon. But it's a lot like camp. Or so I've heard.

[chacha]

It'z a feeld trip! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[voodoo_revenge]

I don't think it's school sanctioned.

[wilderness_explorer]

Hmmm maybe this is a test camp!

Nice to meet you! Are you one of the cownsellers?

[voodoo_revenge]

Nice to meet you too. I'm Kyoko. No I just got here too. I'm in the Love-Me section.

[wilderness_explorer]

There's a Love-Me section of the Wilderness Explorers?

[voodoo_revenge]

No, I was never in Girl Guides. But there is at LME. That's my talent agency.

[exorcisms_2000yen]

Is that one of those troupes of young boys who earn merit badges? How old are you?

[wilderness_explorer]

Aah I guess...

(What's a troupe?)

I'm 9! I had my birthday a week ago!

[exorcisms_2000yen]

So close! Well anyway, happy late birthday then, kiddo. I bet there's still some of that giant cookie left in the galley, if you can find it...


((errr troop unless yours entertains... late night posting lol))

[wilderness_explorer]

There's a GIANT COOKIE?

Ah... Uh I'm sure I can find that place if I can just work this map.

[exorcisms_2000yen]

Yup, with pretty writing and and a not so very nice message but that doesn't really matter when you're eating it.

I'd help out kiddo, but it doesn't seem to be working well for me either.

[wilderness_explorer]

Mr Fredericksen says I have a sixth sense for chocolate so maybe he is right and I'll find it by accident. Do you think that could happen? That would be so cool.

I think I see some buildings now... Maybe I can help you out if you need a hand, I am real good at helping people. Most of the time. Sometimes.

[exorcisms_2000yen]

That could be a very useful sixth sense... Why don't we test it out, okay? Tell me if you can find it without anyone telling you where it is.

You should always stay a helpful boy especially between the ages of 10 and 12.